Monday, July 6, 2009

So, it’s been a busy week, meant to get back to this sooner, but life has a way of diverting you from what you want to do to what you need to do. But the good news is you can always pick up where you left off. So, where were we? Ah, Love Your Kids, Take Care of Yourself. You might ask where this came from. It came about while I was completing my Master’s Thesis on Violence Prevention in Middle Schools. What I found is that by the time kids reach middle school, there is a whole lot of conditioning that has to be undone. So, I thought why not start early and teach children what they need to know from the start. Love Your Kids is a foundation for parenting. It is not a catchall or a panacea, it is a place to start that works across all socio-economic, cultural and ethnic backgrounds. We all want to raise happy healthy kids and not lose ourselves in the process, don’t we?
Each letter in Love Your Kids relates to a different principal of parenting. Of course, one could come up with more, but again, this is the foundation; you build the rest with your family.

Listen – We could all stand to do more of this and yes, there is a difference between hearing and Listening.
Observe your own behavior – Children learn what they live, what are your actions teaching them/
Validate them and their feelings– As social beings, we are all seeking validation from others, family is the first source. If done well, your child will learn to validate themselves from within.
Encourage them and their dreams – seems simple, but too often parents scoff at childhood dreams. If people did not dare to dream, we would not have airplanes and cures for disease.
Yelling is not communication – enough said, for now.
Obey your own rules – Credibility comes from your actions following your words.
Unconditional Love – They need to know they are more important than anything they do.
Respect, Responsibility – Teach it! Model it!
Kiss them – LOTS Everyone needs to feel loved and accepted and special.
Inspire Integrity – teach children to strive to be the best they can be and do be honorable in all that they do.
Discipline – Consistently, fairly and with love.
Savor each moment – They grow up too soon!
Coming up – What does it mean to really Listen.