So, it’s been a busy week, meant to get back to this sooner, but life has a way of diverting you from what you want to do to what you need to do. But the good news is you can always pick up where you left off. So, where were we? Ah, Love Your Kids, Take Care of Yourself. You might ask where this came from. It came about while I was completing my Master’s Thesis on Violence Prevention in Middle Schools. What I found is that by the time kids reach middle school, there is a whole lot of conditioning that has to be undone. So, I thought why not start early and teach children what they need to know from the start. Love Your Kids is a foundation for parenting. It is not a catchall or a panacea, it is a place to start that works across all socio-economic, cultural and ethnic backgrounds. We all want to raise happy healthy kids and not lose ourselves in the process, don’t we?
Each letter in Love Your Kids relates to a different principal of parenting. Of course, one could come up with more, but again, this is the foundation; you build the rest with your family.

Listen – We could all stand to do more of this and yes, there is a difference between hearing and Listening.
Observe your own behavior – Children learn what they live, what are your actions teaching them/
Validate them and their feelings– As social beings, we are all seeking validation from others, family is the first source. If done well, your child will learn to validate themselves from within.
Encourage them and their dreams – seems simple, but too often parents scoff at childhood dreams. If people did not dare to dream, we would not have airplanes and cures for disease.
Yelling is not communication – enough said, for now.
Obey your own rules – Credibility comes from your actions following your words.
Unconditional Love – They need to know they are more important than anything they do.
Respect, Responsibility – Teach it! Model it!
Kiss them – LOTS Everyone needs to feel loved and accepted and special.
Inspire Integrity – teach children to strive to be the best they can be and do be honorable in all that they do.
Discipline – Consistently, fairly and with love.
Savor each moment – They grow up too soon!
Coming up – What does it mean to really Listen.

Hi all, just wanted to let you know the next blog will be comming soon. On vacation & having issues with computer. Will be back soon.
Yours in parenting

The Job of Parenting

Welcome to the toughest job you'll every love, overall. This blog and it's content is designed to provide a foundation for parents to build upon so that they can help their children become the best they can be, while maintaining your sanity, your life and ultimately your relationship with your child. No, it won't be easy, but then again anything worthwhile never is.

Love your Kids; seems simple doesn't it? It's why you have kids in the first place isn't it? Your parents never mention that having kids is a huge responsibility, a 24/7 commitment to the health and well being of another person who will not always be the cute little minion you expect them to be.

What it boils down to is that parenting is a labor of Love and children are the product of that labor (yes, that is the fun part). As with any living thing, you need to begin with a strong base, lots of nurturing, sunlight, opportunity and guidance so that they can stand on their own one day. Really, isn't that the goal, to see our kids thrive, live, love, achieve and ultimately be happy.

Life is the ultimate balancing act. There is so much going on in our lives, we are ruled by our cell phones and planners. Children, however, require a little more personal attention. So, how does one balance the needs of onself, ones' spouse, children, career, family, friends, shopping ...the list goes on. LOVE YOUR KIDS is a plan to help take some of the stress out of parenting.
Coming next, the twelve ways to LOVE YOUR KIDS. These simple ideas when used consistently bring more peace and joy to the time you spend with your kids.

I am going to begin with an intro to this parenting blog and then introduce you to the twelve ways to LOVE YOUR KIDS. I began this journey over 13 years ago and have tried to adhere to the values and principles put forth in the raising of my son and the work I do with foster children. I am a single mom and my son, now 16 is growing into a wonderful young man. He just received his Eagle Scout (and for those who do not know, only 1-2% of scouts reach this level) Yes, I am a very proud Mama. But more importantly, my son, at 16 is kind, strong minded, (we’re working on the open minded part, but hey, at 16 how many kids are open minded about anything). He has a moral compass; he is polite, helps around the house and is respectful to his mother more often than not. We have a good time just hanging out, have some fights but always come out of them with a stronger bond than one could imagine. I have to say he is smarter than me and just like me, so those fights at times are like arguing with myself, but he is better at than me. But we have great talks too; about life, love, sex, drugs and yeah, I’m going to say it, Rock n Roll. When your kid is listening to same music you did in high school how could you not have this conversation. Maybe that is why, by chance the first letter in LOVE YOUR KIDS stands for Listen. If there is one thing I know for sure is there is not enough listening going on in this world. Oh, we hear a lot, but we don’t listen very well. But I digress, that lesson will come soon enough.
So, where were we? Ah, children, your children, this blog and why you need to read it. Love your kids; seems simple doesn't it? It’s the reason you had kids in the first place isn’t it. Ok, in a perfect world, perhaps, but no matter how we become parents, we want to do it right, not make the mistakes our parents made. We want to love them and hug them and make them our own. But we forget that, just as puppies grow noses, kids grow attitudes and become opinionated individuals when you least expect it and at the most inconvenient of times.
Love Your Kids is a back to basic approach to parenting and taking care of yourself in the process. You will find that your kids, overall will be much more enjoyable to be around and your own life will not have fallen off the map in order to sacrifice your life for theirs. You can have it all, but it requires a little forethought and effort on your part, but the outcome is well worth it. Remember, some day, your children may be taking care of you. You want to have confidence in their abilities don't you?